By Frank Meke.
Mr Jimi Alade remains the referee of Tour business in Nigeria. I deliberately and freely use the word referee because jimi ladi Alade lived on this business, made his name from doing this business and when the Dicks and Harrys of Nigeria, the spoilers invaded the sector and messed it up, Jimi pulled out, went home to kogi State and tried local politics.
Now, I don’t really know how a tourism pathfinder like Jimi survived in our toxic politics with its many voodoo mechanics.
Is there politics in tourism? Someone requested that I should go waste my time and prep Artificial intelligence voodoo to find answers to many questions troubling our tourism business in Nigeria.
This same Jimi Alade, whom I consider the godfather of Tour business in Nigeria once told me years ago, that fake businesses and criminal elements amongst us, pretending to be investors, cleverly hid under tourism engagements to flourish their illicit games.
He arrived at this position from experiences doing the job of selling and marketing Nigeria. And if you are careful not be bewitched by strange abracadabra figures as tourism statistics, you probably would discover that ” clean” businesses such as banks, hotels, restaurants, transport, logistics service companies are patent owners of some fraudulent divisive facades.
Before artificial intelligence came on board as a technological feat, voodoo, and Ophiolateria, the worship of serpent reigned supreme.
If you have travelled around the world as I was so privileged, and you are careful to check your environment, your hotel or apartment, you would probably notice strange but very simple markings, artistic works in your room or bed head and may discover pendants with digital cameras giving you away to whoever is interested in the other side of your innocent visit or vacation.
Somewhere in Serbia, during my torrista adventure to the east European outpost, I noticed a beautiful but strange giant artwork on by the door of my room, strangely looking me in the face each time I opened the door. I sprayed the heinous thing with my anointed oil every day and night until I left the place. Please don’t laugh ooo. This world, our tourism space is filled with strange people and behaviours, products or torrista activities.
All of you who think that witchcraft is an African spiritual craft should try to re-examine the development but, in particular, a torrista deal of a Nigerian bank famed for lying to us as a tourism friendly bank.
My point is that every torrista or tourism deal processed through any Nigerian bank is a fraud and voodoo. Two days ago, the economic and financial crime Commission boss told us that Nigerians hate corruption but would turn around to support very corrupt persons or businesses under investigation and that assertion to me is true and troubling and appears to me as if we are bewitched.
It’s then not surprising that the good book condemns anyone who casts spells, or is a medium or spiritist, or consults the dead. Though I don’t have anything against women, I do understand that this voodoo business is so attractive to female folks and no wonder they are called mambo ( manbo).
I heard plenty of low belly men crying of being bewitched by these female voodoo mambos, and in our torrista environment, they are legion . Women ministers and commissioners of tourism Nigeria may be mambos. I didn’t say so oo.
If it’s not organised distributive satanic venture, how can a bank or any financial institution leave its core financial mandate to try and cast spell on the tourism industry with innocuous products sold to divide us and enslave our hardworking practitioners. Someone called it stargra!
I don’t know the brain behind detty December statistics, but I am led to believe that some numbo jumbo voodoo oungah or mambo must be driving the initiative. I consulted artificial intelligence mechanics to confirm the detty December abracadabra, and it asked me to provide more details. What!
It’s a crazy world indeed and in particular in our industry where data are generated to confound and confuse the wise and the simpletons.
One failed fellow wrote recently comparing current and former commissioners of tourism in Lagos and also the current minister of culture and tourism, Hannatu Musa Musawa and former minister of Tourism, lola Ade John. I ran to the Ai domain on my phone, and the names of current and former office holders appeared strange to the voodoo digital platform.
When I sought answers to the magical word , torrista, nothing came up, and I began to worry about phantom generated tourism product designed to lure innocent operators to the pit tourism hell but cleverly programmed to steal operational data of tourism operators in Nigeria. Efcc is tracking plenty of bank managers and directors for money laundering and plundering. Maybe tourism torrista is a soft gel for an insider deal.
Some of us have placed a night watch on these notorious banks and their handful of sycophants in and out of government. We shall collect and document their infractions and run it through a structured regulatory ecosystem, God help us with good men and women backing us. Surely, their days are numbered, and we shall hear the cockrow at dawn.